Mister Lazy likes to wake up before the sun does. He got used to that while in the army, or in the shrimp fishing boat, or at the Buddhist temple, he really can’t remember, but that would explain why he eats green, unflavored stuff with cream on top. Last week he peed on the bed, so now he sleeps on the sofa. When growing up he was a lonely guy, so he made up this imaginary friend, a guy from Portugal (wherever that is) named Sousa. That stupid thing you may have heard that he used to be a nice guy is a myth, it isn’t real, like the man landing on the moon or a black guy becoming the president of the United States. Just lies.
Mr. Lazy is a super walking cliché living myth.

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